March 2003

CONTENTS

Opening Time 1

Doon Yer Neck

Arting About

Charver Watch

Club Stuff

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Charver Dictionary

Ashington Dictionary

Sunderland Metro

Spam-tastic Baltic

Charver Board

BALTIC BOSSES say there's no need to panic after it was revealed there is a £1.5m hole in their accounts - less than a year since the gallery opened. According to The Guardian the director, Sune Nordgren, has been "hauled over the coals" by the Arts Council for the gallery's dire financial situation. The official Baltic line is that they have been far too busy coping with the massive number of visitors to catch up with the paperwork, and the running of the gallery and its integrity will not be compromised. "The Baltic will continue to showcase the work of Northern Europe's best male artists, under the guidance of Swedish boss Sune Nordgren," a close friend told Newcastle Stuff. Quite where Glaswegian Popstars and Pop Idols runner-up Darius fits in, is anyone's guess. He played a gig there last month in front of 300 teeny fans, whose pocket-money must have been greatly appreciated by our cash-strapped beacon of culture. VISITORS TO The Baltic needn't bother bringing their dancing shoes - the Saturday night Salsa sessions on the top floor have been scrapped. (And no, we're not making this up). Speaking to the Evening Chronicle last month, Sokol Abazi, of the North East Latin American Dance Association, claimed they have been banned because they didn't spend enough money at the bar. "We had 100 people at the first session and 120 at the second. Now we have been told there are not going to be any more as they claim we don't drink enough." The events were held in McCoy’s restaurant, who said they were only on a trial, which was not financially successful. MEANWHILE it's to be hoped that the live music sessions in the downstairs bar attract a thirstier crowd, as the gallery continues its drive to raise cash. The 'Eclectic Jazz' events occur on alternate Thursdays and Sundays. The holder of ticket number seventeen at last month's Ivory Silk gig is urged to contact the Baltic immediately - you've won the meat draw and the domino card.
IT WAS predicted to be a major boost to the Newcastle-Gatesheed Capital of Culture bid by the local mainstream press, and a showcase for all that's good about this city. But the reality is that The One And Only, filmed on Tyneside, has turned out to be a stinker. The multi-million pound movie stars Patsy Kensit and the screenplay was scripted by Peter Flannery, whose 1990s BBC masterpiece Our Friends In The North is perhaps the finest work ever written about Newcastle. However, it has been mauled in the national press. The Sun - that arbiter of culture and sophistication - headlined a page: "Boobs At The Box Office: Kensit - Queen Of The Turkeys"; listing The One And Only as One Of Her Worst. Despite a high-profile premiere at the new Odeon cinema last month, the movie had disappeared from local screens before we here at the Cynic Centre had a chance to check our facts. But according to the Evening Chronicle, a mere eight people sat through its second Saturday afternoon showing at the Odeon, and it was "mainly pensioners" who attended screenings at the Warner Village.
THE COUNCIL’S plans to mark the spot where The Beatles wrote the number-one single She Loves You have descended into farce - as nobody knows exactly where the tune was penned. Paul McCartney recalls sitting in a Newcastle hotel room after a gig at the Majestic Ballroom in 1963, where he and John Lennon began work on the song. Until now, it was thought that this was the Imperial Hotel, in Jesmond. Newcastle Council announced they were going to erect a commemorative ‘blue plaque’ outside the hotel, as part of their drive to celebrate the city’s culture. But last month a retired taxi driver claimed the band stayed at the Turks Head, in Grey Street - and he should know, as they went there in his cab. Les Curry, now aged 68, reckons he picked the band up from the Central Station before the concert, on June 26th, 1963. The lads paid him three-bob for the trip, and he got all of their autographs. The Turks closed in the early 1980s, but was one of the city’s swankier establishments. The likes of Rod Stewart and David Bowie threw after-show parties in its Punchinello Bar. She Loves You was released in August of 1963, becoming their second UK number-one and helped launch the band in America. So why is Newcastle Council so keen to mark the forty-year old efforts of a bunch of Scousers? Discounting The Animals, who never wrote any of their hits (and Sting, who buggered off long before he was famous), the sad fact is that the only Tyneside-based act to have written and recorded a UK number-one hit is Lindisfarne. This feat was only achieved with the help of a fat alcoholic footballer called Paul Gascoigne, whose ‘novel’ reworking of Fog On The Tyne took it to the top in 1991. No wonder the council is scraping the barrel.